9.16.2013

Craig Biggio, 1993 Milk Bone Super Stars


Names: Craig Biggio, Shelbee the dog
Team: Houston Astros, Houston Fleabags
Positions: Second base, family pet
Value of card: One lick from either of the above
Key 1992 stat: For Biggio, less fashion sense than his dog
Shelbee the dog's train of thought from 11:29 to 11:31 a.m., Feb. 2, 1993: "Dad, why are you spelling my name out for that stranger? And how many times do I have to tell you, it's 'Shelby,' with a Y. Only an idiot would use two E's. ... Oh, it's picture time? Great! You're going to change your clothes, right? Um, dad? You're not going to wear a tucked-in T-shirt and a brand-new white ball cap, right? ... No, let go of me! I can't be seen with you like this! Oh doggone-it, why are you sitting down? No, don't      no, don't spread your legs like that! Those jeans are tighter than my collar! Everyone will be able to see the Killer B's! ... Jeez, this is embarrassing. That's it, I'm pooping in your cleats."
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