Name: Bob Kipper
Team: Pittsburgh Pirates
Value of card: As much garbage as you can fit in that hat
Key 1985 stat: 365 kips (British slang for naps)
Conversation between a Topps photographer and Bob Kipper during spring training in 1986:
Topps photog: "Hi Bob, we're gonna take some photos
Bob Kipper: "Huh? Oh, hey, man. You got any chips? And dip?"
TP: "Hmm, no. I was just going to take your picture. Do you want to stand up?"
BK: "No, man, I'm good. Standing's just so strenuous, you know? It's much cooler staying close to the ground. With the Earth."
TP: "Well, I guess that'll work. Can you open your eyes a little more, though?"
BK: "My eyes are open, man. Wide open. I can see everything, you know?"
TP: "Oh yes, and I can see what you've been up to, for sure. But before a baseball game? That's so nuts."
BK: "Doughnuts? I love doughnuts! Can I have one, man?"
TP: "Um, sure." (Hands Kipper a batting doughnut) "Chew on that for a little while."