Name: Earl Weaver
Team: Baltimore Orioles
Value of card: A minuscule denomination of money no longer in circulation
Key 1981 stat: 211,900 wrinkles
10 real quotes from the one and only Earl Weaver:
10) "Coaches are an integral part of any manager's team, especially if they are good pinochle players."
9) "We're so bad right now that for us back-to-back home runs means one today and another one tomorrow."
8) "Optimism is the cheerful frame of mind that enables a teakettle to sing, though in hot water up to its nose."
7) "Smart managing is dumb. The three-run homers you trade for in December will always beat brains."
6) "(That umpire) is incompetent. (Those other two umpires) are almost as incompetent as (the first umpire). ... The blind one. ... The worst. ... Not smart enough to remember the rule book. ... If he ever touches me again without that blue uniform on, I'll consider it assault and his family will have to fly to see him at Johns Hopkins Hospital."
5) "Don't worry. The fans don't start booing until July."
4) "I think the National League has better biorhythms in July."
3) "Every time I fail to smoke a cigarette between innings, the opposition will score."
2) "If you know how to cheat, start now."
1) "On my tombstone just write, 'The sorest loser that ever lived.'"