9.15.2013

Webster Slaughter, 1992 Pro Line Portraits (Shameful Sunday Portraits No. 24)


Name: Webster Slaughter
Team: Cleveland Browns
Position: Wide receiver
Value of card: 14 zombie warts
Key 1991 stat: $250 earned as backup dancer in Michael Jackson's "Thriller"
Can you hear that?

It's close to midgame, and something evil's lurking on the field
Under the game lights, you see a receiver who almost stops your heart
You try to scream, but Kosar throws the pass before you make it
You start to freeze as Slaughter looks you right between the eyes
You're paralyzed

'Cause this is Slaughter, thriller night
And he ain't gonna save you from the linebacker about to strike
You know it's Slaughter, thriller night
You're fighting for the ball inside a killer, thriller, Slaughter night

You hear the play call and realize there's nowhere left to run
You have the cold hand and wonder if you'll ever see the ball
You close your eyes and hope this is only imagination
But all the while you hear the Kosar throwing from behind
You're out of time

'Cause this is Slaughter, thriller night
And he ain't gonna save you from the linebacker about to strike
You know it's Slaughter, thriller night
You're fighting for the ball inside a killer, thriller, Slaughter night
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