6.11.2013

Stan Mikita, 1972-73 O-Pee-Chee Team Canada (Stanley Cup Week No. 2)


Name: Stan. Mikita
Team: Team Canada
Position: Giant floating head
Value of card: 19 maple leaves
Key 1972-73 stat: Made all the ladies swoon. All of 'em.
Five bits of information we can glean from this expertly designed hockey card:

1) Stan Mikita was approximately 58 years old at the time of this photo. What's that? He was actually 33? Sweet Jeebus!
2) His head was like Sputnik: spherical, but quite pointy in parts. He'll be crying himself to sleep tonight on his huge pillow.
3) He always said his name as though it were two sentences. "Stan." (pause) "Mikita."
4) His hairstyle defied every law of physics known to mankind.
5) The dimple in his right cheek was so deep that it contained, among other things, his wallet, his bicycle and the ruins of an ancient civilization.
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