Name: Mike Schad
Team: Philadelphia Eagles
Position: Offensive line
Value of card: 6 ounces of eagle droppings
Key 1990 stat: 14 returns home to Canada
It's Super Bowl Sunday
Round 1: Intelligence (Winner: Nameless statue)
Round 2: Rock-hard muscles (Winner: Schad)
Round 3: Sense of humor (Winner: Nameless statue)
Round 4: Rock-hard mullet (Winner: Schad)
Round 5: Looks (Winner: Nameless statue)
Round 6: Rock-hard bulge (Winner: Schad)
Round 7: Charisma (Winner: Nameless statue)
Score: Nameless statue 4, Schad 3, Ties 0
Synopsis: Mike Schad — the only Canadian college football player to be drafted in the first round of the NFL draft — might have been "rock hard," but a statue made of bronze proved too hard to beat.

That's either a codpiece or a wedge of gouda.
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