12.29.2012

Glenn Hubbard, 1988 Donruss Diamond Kings (Ho-Ho-Horrendous Diamond Kings Week No. 6)


Name: Glenn Hubbard
Team: Atlanta Braves
Position: Second base
Value of card: A shard of porcelain
Key 1987 stat: Silky smooth skin
It's eyes, they follow you everywhere: Everyone is familiar with bobbleheads, the humorous little figurines given away at baseball games each year. But in 1988, the Braves decided to try something different. Inspired by second baseman Glenn Hubbard's cherubic cheeks and miniature arms, the Atlanta marketing team ordered 10,000 porcelain baby dolls fashioned to look like the athlete. The giveaways were a flop, though, as most fans were creeped out by the dolls' staring eyes and wispy mustaches. Things got worse when it was discovered that the curly hair on the figures was a fire hazard      two dozen Atlanta-area families lost their homes to the toys. One of the dolls even came to life and killed seven people. The figures were eventually recalled, but not before a bewildered amateur artist named Perez drew a series of skin-crawling portraits of the keepsakes. One of these paintings found its way into the 1988 Donruss baseball card set, giving children everywhere (and now you, too) nightmares for weeks. Sleep tight!
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