Mark Grant, 1988 Fleer

Name: Mark Grant
Team: San Diego Padres
Position: Pitcher
Value of card: A Grant (not a $50 bill with Ulysses S. Grant on it, but a Larry Grant, the nickname for a bag of plastic bottles at the Coney Island recycling center)
Key 1987 stat: 14 wascally wabbits hunted down and hit with a baseball bat
Mark Grant is clearly hunting something with a bat; the 10 things he could have been hunting:
10) An actual padre
9) The maker of his bulky Converse All-Star cleats
8) Not a pitcher, but a belly itcher
7) He already hunted down his shadow and is pummeling it
6) A dentist; ahhhhhhhh!
5) The chimichangas Kruk stole
4) A compliment to a mediocre fastball
3) What's left of his career
2) The San Diego Chicken
1) His nemesis, Grant Mark

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