8.02.2012

Duke Kahanamoku, 1991 U.S. Olympic Cards (Summer Olympics Special, No. 4)


Name: Duke Kahanamoku
Event: Swimming
Medal count: 3 golds, 2 silvers
Value of card: 4 coconuts
Key 1912 stat: 472 women romanced
Duke Kahanamoku's dating profile, circa 1912:

Screen name: hawaiianhunk69
Age: 52
Height: 6 feet (6 feet 2 on surfboard)
Weight: 185 pounds soaking wet
Hair color: Salt-and-pepper
Hairstyle: The wave, obviously
Ethnicity: Hawaiian
Religious views: Worships the ocean
Marital status: Married to the water
Want children? I have enough
Best feature: C'mon, the tan, obviously
Smoke? The competition
Drink? Saltwater

Seeking: Just trying to get laid (Huh, huh, get it?)
Location: The Big Island
Her body type: Hula
Her ethnicity: Hula

About me: Aloha, you know me as the Duke, but I'm the king of Hawaii. I basically created surfing and won gold medals in swimming. I've shown thousands of women paradise while in a tropical paradise. My tan is so deep you can't help but fall in. Come, join me on my surfboard of ecstasy and let me mahalo you all night long.
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