Kent Tekulve, 1988 Topps

Name: Kent Tekulve
Team: Philadelphia Phillies
Position: Pitcher
Value of card: About as much as its nutritional value
Key 1987 stat: Enough baby blue to open a day care center
Clearing up some rumors about Kent Tekulve:
  • Tekulve did not have an epileptic fit every time he pitched. He did have one while watching "Tron," however.
  • Tekulve's stirrups did, in fact, go all the way up.
  • Tekulve was not the inventor of the derp face. He just mastered it.
  • There is, in fact, a correct way to pronounce Tekulve's last name. We just don't know what it is.
  • Tekulve's milkshake did, indeed, bring all the boys to the yard. But they were definitely not, like, "It's better than yours."
Card submitted by Keith Malloy


  1. I believe the epileptic fits were Wayne Twitchell's department.

  2. I think you've found out what happened to D.B. Cooper. http://i.cdn.turner.com/trutv/trutv.com/graphics/photos/criminal_mind/scams/DB_Cooper/1-1-Sketch-of-DB-Cooper.jpg