5.16.2012

Frank Viola, 1990 Bowman


Name: Frank Viola
Team: New York Mets
Position: Ace
Value of card: 0.2 ounces of teammates' cocaine
Key 1989 stat: One pair of stirrups worn all season
10 things Frank Viola could be saying the moment this photo was taken:
10) Burrrp!
9) Hiccup. Burp. Hiccup.
8) Belllllch!
7) Mmmmmuuuhhhhogggg!
6) Gghttwuuugghh!
5) Brrrontosaurrrus!
4) Gah! Both ends!
3) Belch! Burp! Belch!
2) Burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrelllleccccchhhhpppppp!
1) Well, pardon me. I should not have partaken in those delicious Mr. Pibbs while my teammates dabbled in prescription painkillers and powder drugs. Oh, my, I am so embarrassed. Please, forgive me, my good sirs, for this objectionable bodily function.
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