Thurman Thomas, 1992 Fleer Pro-Visions (Football Friday No. 119)

Name: Thurman Thomas
Team: Buffalo Bills
Positions: Running back, "The Ball Handler"
Value of card: 18 pounds of bison dung
Key 1991 stat: One unfortunate non-nickname nickname
Time for an American pop quiz:

What, pray tell, is the inherent contradiction of this card?

(A) The back of the card says Thomas is known as "The Ball Handler," but nowhere else in the echoes of time has anyone across this vast land deemed that Thomas' nickname, for obvious reasons.
(B) Thomas plays for the Buffalo Bills, which feature a bison, commonly referred to as buffalo, as the team's mascot, but no bison ever traversed the plains of Buffalo, and, coincidentally, men named Bill are prohibited from entering Buffalo city limits.
(C) This card is a Fleer Illustration, but, at least on the front of the card, the subject is portrayed in a natural, even refined manner, as opposed to how hundreds of others were drawn in the years-long series.
(D) For true Americans like Thomas, the flag's colors never, ever run, but, on this card, they're running, and he's running, and his running is causing their running.
(E) All of the above.

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