4.05.2011

David Wells, 1995 Topps

Name: David Wells
Team: Detroit Tigers
Position: Big fat pitcher
Value of card: 12 Twinkie wrappers
Key 1994 stat: 90 pounds of table muscle
One hefty lefty: How fat was David Wells?
  • David Wells was so fat, he could cover first base from the pitcher's mound.
  • He was so fat, he put food on home plate.
  • He was so fat, all Detroit restaurants had a sign that said "Maximum occupancy: 240 or David Wells."
  • He was so fat, he made Cecil Fielder feel better about himself.
  • He was so fat, he ate batting doughnuts.
  • He was so fat, he had seventh-inning stretch marks.
  • David Wells was so fat, this is actually two cards.

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