4.16.2011

Dan Ford, 1986 Topps

Name: Dan Ford
Team: Baltimore Orioles
Position: Outfield
Value of card: One empty Colt .45 malt liquor bottle
Key 1985 stat: Made sweet love to all the ladies
Top 10 things Dan Ford was smoother than in 1985:
10) Butter
9) His batting helmet
8) The lenses of his prescription sunglasses
7) Jim Palmer's delivery
6) Billy Dee Williams
5) Cal Ripken Jr.'s swing
4) The backside of the baby he just made
3) A chilled shot of cherry-flavored vodka
2) Earl Weaver's tummy
1) Don's Aase
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