Frank DiPino, 1991 Upper Deck

Name: Frank DiPino
Team: St. Louis Cardinals
Positions: Pitcher, hunched over
Value of card: Debilitating back pain
Key 1990 stat: Well, I mean, look at that thing!
Fun facts about Frank DiPino's bulge:
  • It caused DiPino to stand like this all the time.
  • Its name was Maurice DiPino.
  • It had its own mailing address and Social Security number.
  • It opened a coffee shop in St. Louis called Bulge's Beanery.
  • It also wore a cheesy gold chain just like Frank's.
  • It was taller than Ozzie Smith.
  • It was tossed out of three games in 1990.
  • Its favorite pitch? The high, hard one, of course.


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