2.23.2011

Dwayne Schintzius, 1991-92 Upper Deck (White Ballers Week No. 4)

Name: Dwayne Schintzius
Team: San Antonio Spurs
Position: Center
Value of card: 1 cup of residue from Aquanet application
Key 1990-91 stat: Three shades of neon
10 little-known facts about Dwayne Schintzius' god-awful mullet:
10) He grew the top himself and stole the rest from a ferret.
9) It inspired the Spurs to add neon to team uniforms.
8) Despite flag on warmup jersey, it was not made in America.
7) Voted twice as ridiculous as the name "Schintzius."
6) Barber used spurs to cut it.
5) In playing time, it averaged two minutes more per game than Schintzius himself.
4) It drew attention away from Schintzius' disfigured ears.
3) Its nickname: the Lobster. (True)
2) For two years, attracted more tourists than the Alamo.
1) He brushed it once.

Share/Save/Bookmark

No comments:

Post a Comment