12.23.2010

Joe & Brian Sakic, 1993 Upper Deck Bloodlines (Alternative Sports Week No. 5)

Names: Joe and Brian Sakic
Teams: Quebec Nordiques, Erie Panthers, respectively
Positions: Centers
Value of card: A pint of blood, on the ice
Key 1993 stat: One photo shoot on top of a parking garage
It's brother against brother in The Matchup:

Round 1: Mullet, of course (Winner: Brian, by a hair)
Round 2: Talent (Winnter: Joe, by a lot more than a hair)
Round 3: Classy white pocket square (Winner: Brian)
Round 4: Having an actual reason to ever wear a tuxedo (Winner: Neither)
Round 5: Bigger stick (Winner: Brian)
Round 6: Square-headedness (Winner: Brian)
Round 7: Most noogies given to the other brother (Winner: Joe)
Round 8: Clip-on bow tie (Winner: Tie)
Round 9: Firmer grasp on his shaft (Winner: Joe)

Final score: Brian 4, Joe 3 (Ties: 2)

Synopsis: The extra time Brian took to grease his mullet the morning of the shoot paid off. He escapes with a narrow win over his brother, leaving Joe to weep on his Stanley Cup rings, Olympic gold medal, all-star jerseys and millions of dollars.
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2 comments:

  1. Awesome battle of the bros... Brian's mullet FTW.

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  2. Brian had a lot of talent, but it's speculated that he was kept out of the NHL, blackballed if you will, because of a nasty sex incident in his junior career.

    I actually saw Brian Sakic play for the Austin Ice Bats in 1996. 'Joe Sakic Way' is 2 minutes from where I live.

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