9.28.2010

Ron Kittle, 1989 Topps

Name: Ron "Dynamite" Kittle
Team: Cleveland Indians
Position: Left field
Value of card: That steak in the freezer, half of it
Key 1988 stat: 52 "Vote for Pedro" T-shirts made
10 quotes from "Napolean Dynamite" slightly tweaked to correspond with Kittle's career (changes in bold):
10) "I spent my offseason in Alaska with my uncle hunting wolverines."
9) "Sorry I'm late. I just got done playing long toss with a wild honeymoon stallion for you guys."
8) "I took the second baseman to the mall to get some Glamour Shots for his birthday one year."
7) "Candy, you fat lard. Come get some dinner."
6) "It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a Tigers player mixed."
5) "You know, like nun-chuck skills, bow-hunting skills, sacrifice-bunting skills ..."
4) "What the flip was Sandy Alomar Jr. doing at the sand dunes?"
3) "I already get my mullet cut at the Cuttin' Corral."
2) "Do the San Diego Chickens have large talons?"
1) "I caught you a delicious bass after we played each other in that game the other night when I went 0-for-4."

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