Bill Bergey, 1980 Topps (Football Friday No. 47)

Name: Bill "The Bulge" Bergey
Team: Philadelphia Eagles
Position: Middle Linebacker
Value of card: If you adjust for (crotch) inflation, 2 cents
Key 1979 stat: One awkward dance before each game
10 things that could be stuffed down Bill Bergey's pants:
10) 66-pound cup
9) A mediocre baseball card blog's cup
8) A disco ball that's prompting him to dance
7) All the NFL's Astroturf
6) Shoulder pads for his "buddies"
5) The gameday football, and two other balls
4) A living, breathing eagle
3) A living, breathing Eagles player
2) An identical bulge to the disguised man behind him
1) Another beard


1 comment:

  1. The real tragedy is that to make the card, they cut Bill's dance partner, Frank LeMaster, right out of the photo. They both used to shake a mean pre-game version of the Hustle together.

    Two factoids:

    1) The Hustle is not easy in full pads
    2) Disco flute is perhaps the most underrated musical element in the history of tune making