1.27.2010

Gary Sheffield, 1989 Topps Bazooka insert

Name: Gary Sheffield
Team: Milwaukee Brewers
Position: Outfield
Value of card: Five petrified pieces of bubble gum
Key 1988 stat: Two Ted Power books read
Choose your own adventure: You are Gary Sheffield, stud baseball rookie and badass. Your gold necklace weighs 5 pounds and your bat shoots stars when you swing it. You're on deck during the bottom of the ninth in a tie game with the White Sox and decide to pop a refreshing piece of Bazooka bubble gum. OW! Turns out the gum you put in your mouth is hard as a rock, and you now have two broken molars! Manager Tom Trebelhorn is ready to send in a pinch hitter for you. What do you do?

To wuss out and let someone else bat for you, click here.
To pop another piece of delicious Bazooka gum and let the chips fall where they may, click here.
To lose your mind and start shooting stars from your bat at everyone, click here.
To rip off your sleeves, swallow your broken teeth and stride to plate like a badass, click here.
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